Archives par mot-clé : Bible

Critical issue

Bereshit (Genesis) 13:16

And I will make your seed like the dust of the earth, so that if a man will be able to count the dust of the earth, so will your seed be counted.

It’s a give-and-take. When Abram reaches the age of 99 and becomes a father for the second time –  within wedlock this time – the Lord renames him “Abraham” and requires of him and his “posterity” a subtle anatomical modification:

Bereshit (Genesis) 17

  1. This is My covenant, which you shall observe between Me and between you and between your seed after you, that every male among you be circumcised.
  2. And you shall circumcise the flesh of your foreskin, and it shall be as the sign of a covenant between Me and between you.

Could it be that the Eternal One, always well-informed, has caught wind of a certain shameful practice his male creatures blithely resort to?  A technique consisting of moving “ the flesh of [their] foreskin” back and forth around the glans, in order to conceive a pleasure that’s not only villainous but certainly harmful to the fertility rate of the Chosen nation!

Read Homo juchremanensis (e-pub/kindle) and make up your own mind ! About this critical issue for the future of the species and a lot of others!

Happiness on earth

So, you guys want to understand how the world ended up with these Netanyahu, Trump, Putin, Maduro, Al-Sissi, Ayatollahs, Taliban, Cardigan, Ski Jumping or whatever their f* names spell. You guys would like to figure out how 8 billion people, despite their being equipped with the average quantum of neurons, can let themselves be taken for a ride by a bunch of retarded reptilians. You guys would like to guess by what unfortunate chain of events normal persons allow themselves to be starved, bombed, massacred, robbed of their homes, imprisoned, raped and tortured without anybody around but mentioning it in passing (when they do) and then business as usual! You guys are wondering how the hell children are deprived of their childhood and turned into wild animals who, if they escape the horrors inflicted on them, will only retain an infinite desire for vengeance!

And of course, you guys would like like to know if there’s a way out of this mess.

Well, as luck would have it, you guys know how to read and have access to a reader, a tablet or a telephone! And I’ve got just what you need! Released ten days ago for download in e-pub or kindle format, it’s a gem of a book called Homo juchremanensis. Two small hours of reading that might prove worthwhile. For, as the german proverb goes :  “To understand and to be understood makes our happiness on earth.

God’s plan for dinner

 

Bereshit (Genesis) 4

  1. “She [Eve] gave birth again, this time to his brother Abel. Abel became a shepherd, while Cain was a worker of the soil.
  2. An era ended. Cain brought some of his crops as an offering to God.
  3. Abel also offered some of the firstborn of his flock, from the fattest ones. God paid heed to Abel and his offering,
  4. but to Cain and his offering, He paid no heed. Cain became very furious and depressed.

The Eternal One of the Torah is clearly a “meat lover”. The fragrant scent of barbecued “first-born cattle” fat speaks to him better than that of a slow-cooking potato and leek soup. And yet :

  • through its manure, burps and flatulence, the average cow releases a gas which can trap 30 times more heat per tonne emitted than the carbon dioxide contained in the chimneys of factories, cars and airplanes!
  • if one consumes 100 calories of grains, such as corn or soy, he/she gets those 100 calories. If one uses the grains to feed an animal, when the animal is killed and turned into food, only a tenth of the energy of those 100 calories of grain goes to the person consuming the animal.
  • Insofar as 70% of the world’s freshwater is used for agriculture, by limiting water consumption for livestock farming vegetarian diets would strongly help having a smaller water footprint, on the basis of a similar protein intake.

We can now begin to understand why Cain was so upset to see his offering snubbed by the Eternal One.

And also why your youngest, no doubt cleverer than his parents and possibly a future environmental activist, is sulking over his/her lovingly pre-cut steak.

Read more about  Homo juchremanensiss daily life ! (e-pub/kindle)

Jesus saves

Matthew 25:

  1.  “His master said to him, ‘You wicked and lazy servant, you know that I reap where I have not sown, and that I gather where I have not winnowed;
  2.  So you should have given my money to the bankers, and when I returned, I would have withdrawn what was mine with interest.
  3.  So take the talent away from him, and give it to the man with the ten talents.
  4.  For to him who has shall be given, and he shall have plenty; but to him who has not shall be taken away even that which he has.
  5.  And the useless servant, cast him into outer darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.”

But then, doesn’t a parable conceal tons of subtleties inaccessible to the average believer? So much so, in fact, that the Church has long been reluctant to allow biblical texts to be read by the general public3. In this particular case, however, it would seem that the message of « holy complementarity » between Gospels and the banking business has got through. As proof, who among the faithful today would question the fact that a bank4 may call itself “Banco Espirito Santo”?

Read more in Homo juchremanensis (e-pub/kindle)

As good as new!

– Say, Gamble…

– Yes, Procter?

– Our Bonux sales have taken a serious nosedive in recent months, haven’t they?

– Yep! What can we do about it?

– I’ve got an idea, but…

– Go on!

– What if we started a new label? […] Same basic ingredients as for Bonux, same manufacturing plants… All we have to do is come up with some original packaging…

 

End of interlude. Back to real life. Jerusalem, year 000 minus a few years. The New Testament is underway !

All details in Homo Juchremanensis by F.Y. Richard (e-pub/kindle).